I've only been on anesthesia once. I fell "asleep" crying while the doctor was talking about his sons and chapstick. I woke up fine, but the nurses were all up in my face confused about how I wasn't crying, which just confused me. At first one of them tried to get me up off the chair, but I fell down and hit my shoulder. They gave me a couple minutes but when two of them tried to get me to walk I just fell and hit my head. They didn't give me anymore time and basically carried me out of the room. They later explained that kids who fall asleep crying wake up crying, and I was an outlier. 2/10, would not recommend.

I woke up crying. The lady was like "Is your throat hurting?" and I nodded. (Tonsils.) But it wasn't. It was my freaking arm that they jammed a needle into.

Fr. Schizophrenia is no bueno. Lol just took a test and I'm High Risk. I know I'm not though. (But maybe that's what they all say Lol.) But also some of the questions I still found fault with because they could be subjectivly answered.

Ayyyy I'm high risk too! Sounds like we took the same test as well. I've had my fair share of short lasting hallucinations and delusions

I don't have much except for voices. Wait. Is that normal? The thing is. I consider my personality to be a million parts of the one. I literally conceptualize it as the thing for selecting a color from that square. (y'know what I mean?) When I'm most stable, only a few of me's talk, if any. Sometimes only one. But the more unstable I am, the more I shatter into pieces and sometimes like seven of them are loose at once as well as shifting to different parts as they talk.

And I suffer under some paranoia delusions. Why I'm low-key scared of authority figures or any social situation where I'm not in control. But I blame that on some stuff that happened in my childhood.

So. Diagnosis, Doc?

Aww :(

Lol that makes me feel nice things.

(y'know what I mean?)

Yes, why am I so happy about that?

Idk. Why are you? Also I didn't capitalize that Y. Hmmmmm.

F in chat for Dom's wimpy arm

I was eight, so…

F in chat for Dom's: wimpy arm

I was eight, so…

I have manly arms now. With biceps like potatoes hiding under my skin, waiting to jump out and yell "Surprise!" at an unsuspecting person that walks by in the middle of the night.

Aw that's cute.

I don't have much except for voices. Wait. Is that normal?

It depends. Can you define where the voices are coming from? Are they outside, a foreign voice? Are they in your head, like internal dialogue, but not exactly coming from "you"?

Kind of depends. Some voices used to be not me. (The ones that first started tearing me down and prompting self harm, for instance. But that one also used to feel like it came from one part. Now all of them have integrated a bit.) But when this happens, I don't exactly have a me as much as an observer that can't think much + all the voices that are me trying to make their position win.

The thing is. I consider my personality to be a million parts of the one. I literally conceptualize it as the thing for selecting a color from that square. (y'know what I mean?)

Lol no, but this isn't inherently problematic behavior. Until you say this:

When I'm most stable, only a few of me's talk, if any. Sometimes only one. But the more unstable I am, the more I shatter into pieces and sometimes like seven of them are loose at once as well as shifting to different parts as they talk.

This is a unique experience. Schizophrenia's predominant symptom is loss of touch with reality, and consequently a disconnection with the self. This is really difficult to pick apart from an outside perspective. It could be normal for you, it could be concerning. The way you described it, it does sound distressing. Definetly bring that up to a parent and doctor.

The time I talk in my head (minus the more writer + winning arguments from two years ago parts) are not rare, but nowhere near all the time. And when I'm stable it's normally two that discuss pros and cons and make a decision. The times when I fall apart (which is less and less, the more I control my mind) that's when they all fight and I feel most disconnected. (Think on the floor crying while all the adults are shouting about what they want. I try to talk to them sometimes, but they are also me and can read my mind and stuff when they listen (though of course they sort of have to so…)) But normally it continues and fades and I move up or I get strong enough to force them out. But I also don't have perfect memory in general so I might be remembering some things wrong. Once upon a time it was like the Sad, Angry, and… Calm Levelheaded Dude. But there are a lot more that can shift around now. But like I said, this only happens on really bad mental health days.
But yeah I'm not getting help. At least not now. Too much to handle. I go the way of Everything Is Fine.

Aww :(

Lol that makes me feel nice things.

The idea of you crying makes me highly empathetic

It just makes me uncomfortable
Okay fine and a little sad

It makes me sad but also uncomfortable because I never know what to do when other people are hurt

HUG.

What do you think about my issues, Jyn?