The Miracle family!!

Why didn't the vampire attack Taylor Swift?

She had bad blood

No, she just has forty thousand guards and is always in a really bright spotlight. DUH

I'd like to thank Roman for giving me advice on Romance
To thank Virgil for teaching me about poetry
Patton for teaching me how to pat someone down
And Logan for giving me a logical input on life.

Same here.

Unrelated but my hot cocoa is so creamy and delicious I feel like I'm drinking melted milk chocolate but better

Unrelated but my hot cocoa is so creamy and delicious I feel like I'm drinking melted milk chocolate but better

Lucky

I made a spidersona, they are my child. I have not decided on a gender so they might be genderfluid, but I dunno.

I scared everyone off…

no, genitor, I'm here!

Thank you, son/daughter/child.

I scared everyone off…

No, they were already terrified by my hot cocoa

Thank you, son/daughter/child.

You can call me son. I was looking up what a spider sona was

Thank you, son/daughter/child.

You can call me son. I was looking up what a spider sona was

Pft!

I'M HERE ALSO

H ARRON

Hello A A Ron

Thank you, son/daughter/child.

You can call me son. I was looking up what a spider sona was

Pft!

I was confused!!

Hello A A Ron

Really?

Hello A A Ron

Really?

Yes

Unrelated but my hot cocoa is so creamy and delicious I feel like I'm drinking melted milk chocolate but better

Thanks for reminding me I have hot choclate

Hello A A Ron

Really?

Yes

Oof

Places with lots of mountains aren't just funny, they're hill areas.

Want to test my bird knowledge?
Well, toucan play that game

Oh god. NO PUNS

Why couldn't the bicycle stand up?

It was two tired

Why did I just read two pages of dad jokes?
Is this what happens when I disappear?
You guys become so dad-starved that you make dad jokes to fulfill the void?

XD OMG IDEKAM

Ok but I think I make more bad puns and dad jokes than my actual real life dad

My dad is a father and a History/Government/Economics teacher… I get to hear him make so many damn puns literally all the time dear lord

I remember at 6 years old I made my first pun without reading it off a magazine first…

"What do you call a dog eating bubble gum?"
"A CHEW-WAWA"

(I learned since that gum would actually kill dogs due to the Xylitol used to sweeten it but that's not important)

Whoa that's a lot of damage(and pages)