Ways to creatively murder people (Will not be responsible if someone is actually murdered.)

I am horified at the things people think of but ok?

Slowly beating someone to death with a spoon.
Sticking a blade onto their crutch so they cut their axillary artery.
Letting them stew in pineapple juice, which is acidic enough to cause damage in large quantities over long periods of time. Then, when they finally give up and drown (or die in any other way), cook them like a nice pineapple-y ham (it's delicious).
Stick a spike object (like a porcupine) down their throat. If they talk or swallow, the pricks will cut open their trachea.
Inject them with ketones, causing irreversible ketoacidosis, so their blood vessels burn (actually this might be a bit rude, considering people do die of ketoacidosis naturally)(diabetes sucks, give to the American Diabetes Association at http://www.diabetes.org/)

Get the target in contact with a poisonous animal of sorts, though I personally suggest an animal with a good ammout of tetrodotoxin, like the California Salamander/Newt. The person can handle them, of course, but if that tetrodotoxin makes its way into a person's blood stream or digestive system they will eventually die if they don't get help.

@RedEeveestar So blended newt in their smoothie, then?

@Lord_Dunconius Yes!

Forensic science major here!

What sort of thing do you want in the crime? Untraceable body, untraceable killer, gory, fast death, slow death, etc.?

Mix some belladonna into their food.

1. Wear VERY popular shoes that are a few sized too big or two small.
2. Take either longer or shorter steps.
3. Stab them with wood, then burn the wood

15 ways to kill someone with a banana (Thanks to Faithe Ondracek from Wattpad)

1. Shove down throat
2. Sharpen tip then freeze it over night then continuously stab victim
3. Shove up nose of victim
4. Take off banana peel, let victim fall and hit head
5. Drop banana from the top of the empire state building
6. Slap victim with peel REALLY REALLY hard
7. Grow banana tree then cut it down and let it fall on victim
8. Poison banana then feed it to victim
9. Put banana in hoodie/pocket of victim then let crazy monkeys loose.
10. Put peel on cliff and let victim slip and fall of cliff into a pride of bananas
11. Stick gun in banana the shoot the victim with banana gun.
12. Replace victim’s car brakes with bananas
13. Use banana like boomerang, hit victim with it.
14. Banana num-chuks
15. Poison banana cake

15 ways to kill someone with a banana (Thanks to Faithe Ondracek from Wattpad)

1. Shove down throat
2. Sharpen tip then freeze it over night then continuously stab victim
3. Shove up nose of victim
4. Take off banana peel, let victim fall and hit head
5. Drop banana from the top of the empire state building
6. Slap victim with peel REALLY REALLY hard
7. Grow banana tree then cut it down and let it fall on victim
8. Poison banana then feed it to victim
9. Put banana in hoodie/pocket of victim then let crazy monkeys loose.
10. Put peel on cliff and let victim slip and fall of cliff into a pride of bananas
11. Stick gun in banana the shoot the victim with banana gun.
12. Replace victim’s car brakes with bananas
13. Use banana like boomerang, hit victim with it.
14. Banana num-chuks
15. Poison banana cake

yesss. you can call it the banana murders

Kill them with an icicle, it melts and your fingerprints disappear

Use thick gloves, thin gloves still leave fingerprints, always wear shoes and socks, use very generic or popular ones, or sand the bottom to make it smooth, avoid plants and distinct bugs, don't wear any jewelry and generic halloween masks and fake hands can be good for fake evidence and covering up your identity, **don't touch anything, even the body, don't re-arrange or mess with anything (except for a staged suicide or accidental death) (I'm a forensic nerd XD )

This post here: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/294352525636464135/
Is very good about how to murder people.

As far as creativity goes, why not try contaminated blood? If you take a different blood type then they are and put it in slides hands across throat
Arranging it like a suicide, or making it look like a circus trick gone wrong, both are other options. Bleeding out, acid, emulation, or freezing (or a mix of all of those), could be fun too.
How about rupturing their aorta? Bleed out in seconds, + it's all internal, so smaller mess.
Wound reopening, such as a head injury just never let it heal.
Cut a hole in their chest, (not a fatal one), place some rich, healthy dirt in there, and plant a seed. Watch as the infection kills them, and the roots work their way into the body, eventually piercing the heart/lungs/etc. Slow, but fun.
Also bear in mind that the skull around the temple is egg-shell thin, and there's lots of fun things to do with that, and ALSO, if you poke a hole in their spinal cord pretty low down, all their cerebral fluid will drain out, leaving their brain pressing against their skull, (EXTREMELY PAINFUL, but not fatal), then, inject some ink/dye/soap/foreign liquid of your choice into the spinal cord and flip them upside down. Even more fun if you can see it trickling down with a light or something.

Anyways, that's all I got, hope some of these helped

I have these thick, fiberless snowgloves that would be perfect for murda.

AH YISSS! MURDA JOHN!

I know a location perfect for murder.

HIIIIIIII!!!!

whispers what is it?

Heyyyy. I’m dismissed from school now. -u-

^O^ YAAAAAAAAAAY

^whispers^ At our school we have these tennis courts, the more later the time is, the more emptier the place is. And it’s on a hill side perfect for throwing the body or to hide it.

If someone happens to be murdered there, I am not responsible for it.

maniacal laughter
PERFECT

If they fall in the bathtub/shower, that doesn't mean they'll die… Just like with falling down the stairs.

People assume that if you fall down the stairs you die… But my great grandmother of 92 did it a couple years back and survived, granted, it is a big cause of death for humans, but it's not as final as getting shot. Same with the bathtub/shower.

I learned the icicle one from The Westing Game. Put a very slippery substance in their bathtub. When they go to shower, they’ll fall.

The Westing Game was a good book. I know Angelia actually did this to herself, but you could do that thing with the gift. (Was that her name? Been a while since I read it.) You put an explosive in a box disguised as a birthday present. It is activated by when you open the “gift”.

@WolfieVampire1946 I'm amazed that you have so many

It's a gift. XD

Make them somehow eat apple seeds, eating enough of them will cause damage because amygdalin will release cyanide into their body and kill them. However they have to chew the seeds, there is a strong coat that will protect the seeds from digestive juices. But, you would have to eat 200 seeds for it to be lethal, though even small amounts can cause seizures or damage to the brain. You can choose how much you want to hurt your character, or you can choose different seeds as well (cherry and other pits work too) Good luck killing your character!

You have to factor in the fact that they have to eat them all within a VERY short time of the first one being consumed in order for this to work, though.

Why does everybody know such creative ways to kill people?

From all the murder books we read. I read a ton of books about serial killers.