(woa that is amazing, especially like the line spacing thing….i dont quiteee understand what it is about though? maybe im just dense) (ooook ik i have not been on in ages but here is one thing i did last night)
I'm not ill or diseased.
I'm not stressed or distressed.
To put it bluntly,
I just feel like dying.
I don't hurt myself because everyone else does it!
I don't bleed because I'm upset,
I bleed because I don't feel upset,
And I think that I deserve to.
This is not some brain malfunction or scientific disorder
I don't do this out of some instinctive coping mechanism
Because my life's going fucking dandy
I'd just prefer to lead it
I am bathed in a flood of emotions and colors
Laughing, crying, shouting, whispering
And my monotone gray has no place in it
I can't find my face in the crystal reflections
The shaking hand of a robot is simply trying to become human,
The lump in my throat is simply my speakers malfunctioning
If I pull out the wires, perhaps I can paint my arms vermilion
And pass as rainbow?
"Don't buy into all that stuff," you said
"I love you," you insisted, as if that was a problem
Then you told me you were not going to leave me alone, and that you were going to drag everyone into my life
And you walked away, to get the spray paint