Since I've been adding a bunch of character critiques on other people's stuff, I figure it's only fair to expose one of my characters to the general public for a tomato-throwing contest. So, throw away! Harsh critiques are included in this as well. (Go to town, I can take it. ^-^)
Here he is! Have fun. ^-^
(Apologies if everything is suuuuuper long. I had a bit too much fun creating his character.)
(Side Quest: Can you figure out what fandoms I'm in based on the reference pictures I used?)
Okay, I love your character. Micah's Prejudices are beautiful and the "face carved by angels" thing totally cracked me up. I nearly died of laughter when I read "jawline that could cut diamonds". And his favourite possession being his sock collection XD
You said you're open to suggestions for eye colour? Personally I'd have his eyes be just grey instead of grey-blue.
One of your sentences under the mannerisms section confuses me though. It's not a big thing, but this part: "He walks with confidence and uses every but a chair as such, and will only use a chair incorrectly," kind of confuses me.
There is a bit in his "flaws" section that I'd change. It says Micah does everything on his own and therefore has trust issues, when I feel that it makes more sense the other way around. The determination to do everything by himself seems more like the result of trust issues than the reason for it, but maybe that's just me.
It does kind of bug me that Micah seems to favour women over men and will bend over backwards to assist them in the office whereas he will only help the men if they "ask politely". He's your character so you don't have to change it it just kind of bothers me.
Other than misspelling December as "Decomber" under his birthday and the fact that "American" is not a race, I can't see much else that's wrong.
Branch is a beautiful last name and I absolutely love Micah. He is fabulous. I wish you the best of luck with writing your story.
Thank you for the critique! ^.^
Ooh, okay. Thanks! ^-^
As for that sentence, I wrote it wrong. It was "Uses everything but a chair as such (Meaning, sits on everything but chairs.)." (I don't know what I had in mind for the other bit. I'll remove it. XD
Yeah, you're right. It does seem to make more sense that way, doesn't it?
Thaaats not what I meant. I meant that because he's known to be a "gentleman" he's often called upon for assistance, and will try to help all who need it. (And yes, he does favor females a bit over males, it's in his nature.) He's also open to helping those of the same gender if asked as well. (Like, he won't try to assist every male in the office, only if they ask. He does like to swoop in and carry a box for a female coworker without being asked, so that's why I put that in there. I just forget that most of what I write stays in my head and thus you don't know why I put that distinction.)
(Lol, as usual, my dyslexia gets the better of me when writing. Thank you for that. ;D I'll make those changes asap.)
(Also, I use the "race" section for ethnicity, since there isn't any good place to put it. Sorry if that confused you. ^-^)
Nah it's all good. Glad I could be of assistance. :)
