I'm looking for someone (or multiple people) to critique a short story that I wrote a few years ago.
Short Story Critique
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Deleted user
I can!
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Deleted user
Erm…. not really sure what to think. Never was really good with horror.
Erm…. not really sure what to think. Never was really good with horror.
Tell me what you think. Don't be afraid if you hurt my feelings. I know that everyone has their own opinion on things, and I'll have to get used to it if I want to be an author. 😊
Actually its not bad but there are a lot of gaps. Where is your story going? If it's just about a guy hacking people up it will not keep the readers attention; what was the purpose of killing the mother…will this set the children on some sort of revenge quest? I know that you are not done but make sure that you have a goal in mind.
The biggest thing that I would work on/change is that throughout the entire story you 'told us' everything rather than 'showed.' For a rough draft I think that it is okay just so you have your idea down but I would go back and 'show' us the story.
Hope that helps.