The Revision Squad

Just a reminder, I did write this when I was 13 :)

I managed to convert it so here

It is the near future. Well- for you, at least. A plague has spread through the western continents like wildfire, corrupting the brains of all who fall to it. It is called the Strain, a bacterium that eats away at the frontal lobe and lives in the hollow created, growing rapidly bigger to fill that space as a tangible creature. Scientists cannot cure it or kill it, as it takes over the host corpse and reanimates it. In a way, the world is undead. Few survive, and those that do tend to commit suicide. Why live in a world of nightmares, where your family are living horrors? Death is an easy way out. But why take the easy way out?

I’ve always done things the hard way, ever since I was a little kid. I figure that I have to find a way to live, even in this hellhole. It’s not so bad, really. The Strained don’t move fast since they haven’t evolved yet, so they’re easy to take out.

The worst part is the loneliness. Well, I shouldn’t say that. But it’s definitely in the top five. There’s also the waiting, the knowing what lies ahead but not knowing when or where your former friends or family might be waiting to try and rip your jaws in half so the parasite can consume your brain. If that’s not the worst, then the knowledge that you’re probably the last person left alive in your state, maybe even your country, takes the cake.

So I drift. I can’t really stay in one place for long, but even then I wouldn’t want to. Immobility just draws them nearer, and they bring death with them. I can’t say I don’t fear death. I mean, all men fear death, but what scares me the most is what comes after the death. The “rebirth”, as I’ve heard it called.

I’m not your average human. Then again, the average human in this place is a dilapidated, rotting husk of a man. But more specifically, I’m not human. My name isn’t that important to this story, so let’s just call me Arion. I mean, it is my name, but that doesn’t matter.

I’ve been a genetic engineer since I was fourteen, so it should come as no surprise that when my arm was blown off in a grenade mishap, I replaced it. The synthetic skin over my robotic arm functions just like real skin, but it’s much tougher. I’m acrobatic, but not athletic. Your average teenager, pretty much. By definition, I'm a "Mutant".

Here's some writing I did last year, it's probably not that great but I did win an award for it
https://www.notebook.ai/documents/118223

jerrnvkjsbtjkebgkjhehgk why did you quote it

Uh, because I want feedback on it?? Why the fuck else would I quote it?

I-
I'm sorry? I was just asking?

_{and I'm not stupid so please don't speak to me like I am..}

I didn't mean it in a mean way, I just was confused because I was going to give you feedback (and I'm pretty sure I already did sorta)

_{I feel like they treat everyone that way, man}

_{doesn't make it any less of a hostile reaction-}

_{doesn't make it any less of a hostile reaction-}

_{I agree.}

Ex- Excuse me?
I wasn't "gossiping" about you, I was stating my opinion and voicing MY emotions. :')

_{I feel like they treat everyone that way, man}

false

and isn't this a chat meant for looking over people's writing and giving advice? all jyn was doing was trying to get some feedback from y'all, but because it was longer than a paragraph none of y'all did that. so yeah, in their shoes, i'd be miffed too.

Listen, @SpookyJim had already stated that they were going to look at it when they could. It's simply called patience.

_{I feel like they treat everyone that way, man}

false

and isn't this a chat meant for looking over people's writing and giving advice? all jyn was doing was trying to get some feedback from y'all, but because it was longer than a paragraph none of y'all did that. so yeah, in their shoes, i'd be miffed too.

I literally did give them feedback when they first posted it, but I already explained that I didn't have time to reread it thoroughly at the moment because classes are still in session.

And yes, this is a chat for revision and reviews. I don't appreciate being talked down to and nothing I said in the small text was bad about them.

"I'm sure it's great" isn't critique or feedback. i've gotten that before and personally didn't care much for it when i'm seeking feedback

Like I said, I don't have time to fully read it at the moment and I probably won't until much later in the day but that doesn't mean I didn't skim it over and didn't enjoy it.
If you read the full post, you would see that I was trying to give positive reinforcement because SpookyScarySnoteleks is someone I looked up to as a writer.
So I'm sorry if I came off as rude.

Ah, hello, sorry to bother you all, but I know that this argument is making at least one person feel invalidated and from what I've seen here, this is not the vibes this site was for. I was sent a few quotes before things were deleted, and it seemed like both parties were just feeding off each others negative reactions and making them worse. Like the saying goes (I'm paraphrasing I don't remember the exact wording) "If there is no quiet, people will continue to yell over each other."

Perhaps take a step back, a breather, and come back to it when emotions aren't as heightned?

Ah, hello, sorry to bother you all, but I know that this argument is making at least one person feel invalidated and from what I've seen here, this is not the vibes this site was for. I was sent a few quotes before things were deleted, and it seemed like both parties were just feeding off each others negative reactions and making them worse. Like the saying goes (I'm paraphrasing I don't remember the exact wording) "If there is no quiet, people will continue to yell over each other."

Perhaps take a step back, a breather, and come back to it when emotions aren't as heightned?

I agree with this statement.

That was very eloquent of you, Crypt. :')

Bookmarking for later, I’ll have to translate some of my works I’ve been doing into English for here.

Wait whoa what you're multilingual??? Dude props to you that's so neat!

me big dumb 'merican, me no eggland correcc