Classical Music. Ask me. (It's an order)

Why I am the best (obviously)/Areas of Expertise
~I've been playing piano for 10 years. Boom.
~I've been playing the violin for 8 years. Boom.
~I've been in orchestra for 6 years. Boom.
~I'm third chair first violin. Boom
~I LIKE TWO SET VIOLIN. BOOM!!

IF YOU CAN PLAY IT SLOWLY, YOU CAN PLAY IT QUICKLY

You watch twoset too much too?
glances guiltily at my neglected violin

Do you happen to know any ridiculous drama that happened either between or because of classical composers (i.e. Mozart, Beethoven, etc.)?

ANECDOTES I THOUGHT WERE FUN (note that I read these between 2-49351086 days ago so I might not remember them correctly)
~Beethoven's Fur Elise/Fur Therese/Bagatelle in A Minor was originally composed for one of his piano students, named Therese whom he was in love with. Because she wasn't particularly good, the theme is very simple to play. However, he soon learned that she was engaged to another man, so what did he do? He made the rest of the piece so hard Therese would never be able to play it.
~During a performance by Emanuel Schikaneder (is that how you spell it?), Mozart completely butchered his glockenspiel part, playing loudly when he was supposed to be soft, and vice versa.
~Another Mozart one: at one point, Mozart was hired to write a piece for opera singer (can't recall the name) who was known to lift her head while singer high notes and lower her head while singing lower notes. Just for fun, Mozart put a variety of notes in his composition, so that when she sang it, her head bobbed like a chicken.

Sources
tumblr.com
classicalfm.com

Also Mozart wrote a bunch of songs about poop and butt
(This being played piano since they were 5)

Mozart is just plain awesome, isn't he?