A less dusty voice recorder is returned. It's dated in the present
????: Uh, hello there, Nadia. Your opening was funny, but I'd like to let you know I'm not human. [chuckles quietly]
in the background, loud sounds of rumbling can be heard
????: [in a loud, now semi-irritated voice] My name is Amyr. I don't think my last name matters, does it?
Amyr: I decided to send this is on a voice recorder because I thought it would be nice to match your formatting. Though speaking is slightly dreadful.
the rumbling sound stops
Amyr: [sighs and returns to normal volume] Thank goodness that stopped. Sorry about that, it happens quite a lot here.
Amyr: I'm 22 years old. On my planet anyhow. My favourite colour is green, particularly that of emerald kind. [pause]
Amyr: No, I am not in school and haven't been for quite a while, wait, what do you learn in school? I am a particular fan of chasing down [pauses] a certain creature native to my home. Oh, I guess I should add that I don't reside on Earth very often. Though I do make my visits for sure. [pauses and a faint conversation can be heard]
Amyr: An acquaintance of mine told me to tell you she said 'hello'. Her name is Belynnia. Though that is not very important. My planet, which is named Syridia after our lovely ruler Syrid, is multiple life year from… Earth? You said it's called. [pauses]
Amyr: Oh, and yes, we do have countries. I live in a country called Telligia. There's a lot of lush scenery around here and it's very… green.
Amyr: I've heard of Donald Trump, though I know nothing of him. What's your opinion on him? What's L.A.? Who's Irma and what's a hurricane? It appears my knowledge of Earth would be lacking.
Amyr: I suppose I'll end this here. I await your reply, though I see the recording you sent was dated two… Earth years ago? Sorry it's late, I suppose. I hope you get this. Nakausoura.
Amyr: … sorry, that's goodbye in my native language.
recording ends
A tape recorder, dust-free, but a little blood is on it.
????????: Is it working?
??????: I̷̡͝ t҈͢͝h̶̡͠i̸̧͡n̷͢͠ķ̶̛ s҈̡̛o̷͜͠.̸̨͠
????????: Okay. [clears throat] Hello Ameer. Did I say that right?
??????: P̴̢͇͍̆͛͝ȓ̴̦͎͓̙̜̍̓͒̃͢͠ẹ̷̝͎̰͙̔̈͋͑͜͡t҈̡͉͉̀͒̏͑͠ţ̶̪̣̀̔͝ỳ̷̨̭̲̀̆̑̕ s̵̨̩̦̯͙̭̑̄͝u҉̧͕̳͋̿̂͝ŕ̶̛̳͉̮̊̓̓́͢e҉͍̤̦̓̄́͜͞ͅ y҈̡͙̤̖̣̪̇̄̀̌̂͡o҉͕͎̮͕̿̒̔͜͠ͅų̶͖̖̱͆̈́̔̀̿͞ b̴̧̙̬̯̬̳̒̂̈́̂͝u҉̧̞͖̤͗͐̓̂͡ţ̵̪̦̞̖̜͑̐̄̔̽͡ĉ̶̳̦̄͢͝ḩ̸̪̝̳͙͍̄̓͑͒͝ě̷̫̳̩͚͑͑̿̐͜͡r̶̢̪̲̬̤̳̓͋̋͞e҈̨͚͉͉̝̯̎͆͊̇̒͝d̷̨̥̪̈́̊͠ i҉̧̩͇̮̠̿̌̎͝ẗ̴̡͖̲́͆̉̀̌̕.̴̨̫͉҇̓̾ [pause] S̸͜͠ḩ̵͝i҉̨͝t̸͜͞ a̷̡͞m̷̢͡ I̶̢̕ s҈̡͠t̷͜͡i̵̛͢l̸̨͠l̶͜͠-̶͜͠?̶̧̛
????????: You should just be quiet. Anyway, Hello there. As you can probably tell, I'm not Nadia. Nadia was…
??????: F҈̡͡o̵̕͢r̷̛͜c̶̡̕i̶̡͡b҉̢͝l҉̨̕y̶̡҇ r̷̢͝ę̴͞m̷̕͢o̶̕͜v҉̢͝e҉̢̕d̸̕͜
????????: Declared missing, 3 years ago. I'm Mordecai.
Mordecai: If you don't mind me asking, what was that rumbling sound? It kinda sounded like thunder, but I don't want to assume.
??????: I̶͢͠t̶͜͞ s̵̢҇o̴̧͝u҈͜͡n̶̢͠d̵͢͞s҈͜͡ l҈̧͞i̷̡͠ķ̵͠e҈̧͞ a҉̧͡ d̷̡̛r҈̢͡a̵͜͠g̷͜͠o̶͜͞ņ̵͠,̸̕͜ i̶̢͡f̴̨͞ t҉̢͝h̵̢͠ȩ̷҇y̸͢͝ ȩ̴҇x̶̨͡i̸̛͜s҉͜͞ţ̴͠ȩ̸͞ḑ̸͝.̴͜͠
Mordecai: It sounds like you aren't being quiet.
Mordecai: I'm 16 years old- ah, I mean, Earth-years old. Green's a nice colour, but I prefer magenta. I mean, like, a deep magenta but not a dark magenta? ??????: G̵r̷a̶s̶s̸ ̷g̵r̶e̶e̵n̸ ̷i̶s̴ ̷s̷u̵p̷e̶r̴i̴o̴r̷ ̵a̴n̷d̷ ̷I̸'̷d̸ ̶f̴i̴g̴h̵t̴ ̸y̷o̸u̵ ̸o̴n̴ ̵t̷h̵a̴t̶ ̶i̴f̷ ̵i̶t̴ ̵w̸a̴s̸ ̴p̷h̴y̵s̷i̶c̸a̴l̸l̵y̴ ̸p̷o̸s̷s̴i̵b̸l̴e̵.̴
Mordecai: I'm in grade 10. Well, technically I'm in grade 10. But I've been- uh… how to put it… incapable to go to school for the time being. We're taught a variety of things. English Language Arts; It's kind of just… learning a lot of words in a language we know and how to use them convincingly. Social Studies, which can be summed up as history, morality, and politics.
Mordecai: Mathematics ??????: J̸u̷s҉̵t̷ c̵̵a҉l̶l̴̴ i̵̷t̵̶ m̴a҈̷t҉̷h̵̸ y̸̵o̴u̶̸ B̸҈r̴i̸̸t҉҈i҉̵s̸̵h̶҈ f̵̴u̶c̵̸k̶҉ is basically learning numbers and infinite possibilities. Science is divided into physics, biology, and chemistry. Physics is just guessing and finding out how things like gravity work. Biology is learning how living things work. Chemistry is learning what you can put together to make new stuff.
??????: N҉̡͈̦͊̔̓͞i҉̧̤̲͎҇̊̈c̸̬̙̠̈́̉͐͜͞ȩ̴͑͠ͅ ş̸̰͇͆̐͊͠u̷͔͙҇͛͜m҉̧͎͑͞m҈̳̏́̕͜a̷̡̫̤̔̿͞r̶̳͎̮͆͐̐͜͞y̶̧͚͚̪̾͡ o҈̧̮̦͗̃̈́͝f҈̗̒̊̕͢ h̸̡̛͙̐i҉̛͈͎͆̓̒͜g̵̱͒͂̆̕͢h̴͕̰͛͋͜͠ s̷̡̖̥̾̈̾͡c̷̛̥͙̟̀̉̎͢h҈̡̛̤͌o҈̢̱̾͠o̵̪͐͢͞ļ̵͖̀͒͞.̴̖͉̮̓͢͡ V̸e̴̛̠̦̤̍͆͢r̸͎̽͢͡y̶̢̗̞҇̌͛ͅ v̶ȁ̵̡̪̓̕g̴̨͙͈͑̋͞ṵ̶̡̣̄͑͌͞e̸̢̞̭̖̓̒͡.҉͕̏͜͝ Mordecai: Shut up.
Mordecai: I used to do a lot of singing; I was in the school choir and was usually a part of whatever musical production the school decided on. But that's all in the past now.
Mordecai: Your planet is called Syridia? I like that, it's a nice sounding name. From your tone though, its namesake isn't as nice. No one is quite sure where the name Earth came from. Were you always on that planet, or did your people colonize it?
Mordecai: Telligia sounds nice as well, as a word. What's it like there? Is all the green from nature?
Mordecai: Not sure if Nadia specified what country we're from, but it's called Kanida. It's based off the Iroquois word "kanata" which translates to "village". The land is rather varied, but the area we're in is very hill-y. Not as much green as some of the other provinces, but there's a significant amount of yellow.
Mordecai: I see that Nadia's tape was 2 years ago? That would've been… what, 2018? Late 2017?
??????: T҈̧̖́͝h҉̡̛̬̟͚̾ă̶̡̘̝̈́͝t̷̛̝͕͛͆̈́͜ͅ'̷̛͓̅͜s̶̢̠̗̆͠ ḁ̸̢͙͚̍̑͝r̴̨̤͆̾͠o̶̡̙͍̒͠û̴̢̙̟͋̽͠n̶̬͒̒̉͢͡ͅd҉̨̛̗̙̦̂͊ w҈̛̯̳̊̐͢h̴͉̞̉͑͂͜͡e̵̘̬̫͂̕͜n҈̬̪̥҇̉̐͢s̷̡̥̮͋͞h҈̘̏̕͜ę̴̱̐͞ e҉̡̥̠̓̋̕ŝ̵̗̪̉͢͝c̸̡͔̪̟͐͊͡ȃ̴̙̤̯̅͊̕͢p̸̨̟̄͛̋͡e҈̧͔̐͗̕d҈̢̟̍̉͡ t̶̜̓͢͡h҉̢̯̥͑̏͡ĕ̴̗̭̤͜͞ f̴̧͉͓̰͆̇͌͝i̷̮̾̍̌͢͠ŗ̸̗̩̯̋͊͡s̸̜͋͜͝t̴̡̲̏͊̉͡ t̸̰̬́̈́̏͢͠ǐ̶͇̓̋͜͡m̷̢̛̰̥̙͗e҈͍̎͜͞ Mordecai: Shit, for real?
Mordecai: So, L.A is short for the city of Los Angeles, which is in the United States of America. There's a lot of weird stuff that happens down there. It's also where most well-known people live, which is cool.
Mordecai: A hurricane is like, a water tornado-
??????: N҉̨̛̜̋̇ő̵̡͔̳̌̀͠ i̷̡̙͈̿͝ţ̷͚̌͡ ĩ̷̛͉̠̈́̚͢s҈͉̯̭̆͢͝n҉̡͓̙̫́͗̕'҈̧̗̱҇͆t҉͔̽́͗͜͡.̷͕̭̫̇͢͝ Á̴̢̖̯͎͝l҈s̵͈̓̏̌͜͠o̷̡̪̟̪҇̿,̸̧͔̏͝ w̸̛̳̜̉͂͜ḫ̶̗̑͆̊͢͡ă̴̛̠͕̟̾͢t̵̛̪͔̘̏̉̚͜ i̴̧̮̭̤̐̃͡f̶̡̱̂͡ ṭ̷̝̠͌͗͜͠h҈͕̆͋̈͢͠ę̵͍̞́̄̿͝y̸̯̖̩̅͐̇͜͝ d̴o̴̦̱͑́̇͜͠n҈̧̭͍̀͆͞t҈̤̘̳̽̔͐̕͜ k҈̞̟͙̓̇͒͢͠n̴̛͈̱̉͢o̶̧̤̅̆̒͡w̵̢͈̥͆̎͠ w҈̡̤̤̾̈́͞h̵̢̥̬͎̀͡a̵̫̝̚͢͞t҈͎̱̜҇̾̎̾͜ ȃ̷̡̛͖ t̴̮͉̥̂̔͢͞o҈̘͇̊͗͢͞r̸̛͍̥͔̀͂͢n҈a̸̧̫̣̾̓͝ḑ̷͈̅̐͡o̶͓̜̊͜͡ i̸̢͍̗̦̊͠s҈̨̬͐̈́̐͡?
Mordecai: I was trying to be brief, but whatever. A hurricane is a large rotating storm with high wind speed that happen in warmer climates. Hurricanes have a minimum wind speed of… I think it was somewhere around 120 kilometres an hour? The equivalent of 64 knots. And there's an eye in the centre of it.
Mordecai: We name hurricanes so we can track them better, cause some of them stay for a long while. What kind of natural disasters does your planet have? Are you familiar with term tornado? [yawns] God what time is it? [pause] Damn.
Mordecai: I'll try not to rant about Donald Trump, but there's no guarantee. He's the leader of the United States of America and a fucking terrible excuse of a human being. And I say human being but honestly no one is that orange. He's made stupid regulations and laws and deals. He legitimately destroyed all abortion clinics last year and death rates skyrocketed. He almost has gay marriage banned nationwide, which is such bullshot. Oh and don't get me started on how multiple states have left the country to join another. 2 years ago, Alaska seceded from the country and joined Kanida.
??????: Y҉̡͚̯̗̓͗͒͡o̴̢͓͓͑́͂͞ü̷̢̞̈͝ s҉̙̠͆̽̔͢͡å̷̤͔̣̐̏͜͝y҈̢̤̃̍̍͠ͅ t҈̧͎̬̎̅͝h̴̟͉̃͋͢͡a҈̦͆̈́̏͜͠t҈̲͗̾͢͝ ļ̸̯̦͍́̊͞i̷̧̛̖͛̔̂k̷̮̤͑̊͜͠è̸̢̦͚̙͞ ḭ̵̡͗̿́͠t̵̢̛̳̂̓'̵̡̘̳̀͠s̶̢̛͎̠͉͊̽̇ ą̵̛̪̤̒͐̌ b̷̜̫͌͢͡ḁ̸̛̊͜d̵͇̜̂̏̑̕͜ ṭ̵̨̛̈́h̷̞́̀͆͢͝í̷̧̛̗̪̩͂n̷̢̗҇̅́̽g̵̢̩̏̓͡.
Mordecai: Fair enough. Basically he's an unjust twat with a lust for power who doesn't care about his people. I'll stop it here for now. ??????: T̶͜͠ḩ̴̛e̴̕͢ q̶̧͞u̴͜͡e̵͜͠s҈̢͡t̷̡̛i̸̢͞o̴͜͞n̶̢̕s҉̢͞?̶̧̕ Shit, right.
Mordecai: What's your technology like? ??????: I̴̧͞s̶̨͠ i̸̡̕t̵҇͜m̶̡͠a̵͜͞g҈̕͜į̷͠ç̷͠a҉̕͜l̸?̴͜͞ I҉̢͡s҉̢҇ t҉̢͡h҈̛͢e̵͢͠r̸̢͞e̶҇m҉̨͡a̴͜͠ģ̷͞i̵͢͝c̴̡͠?҉͜͠!҉̢͡ What's it like on Earth in your universe?
[Pause, there's a bit of shuffling around]
Mordecai: [yawns] I guess I'll get going for now– ??????: M̵͢͠ơ̸͢r҉̢̕ţ̵͡ y̶̢͡o̶̢͠u̶͜͡ n҈̨͞e̸̡͞e҈̧̕d҉̨͞ t҈̡͠o̷͜͠ s̵̡͡h҈͜͠u̴̕͢ţ̸҇u̴͢͠p҈̕͢ r̸̡͝i҈̧̛g̸̨͡h҉̢̕t̸͢͞ n̶͜͞o҉̨̕w҈͢͡
Mordecai: What, why?
Footsteps
Mordecai: Oh fuck-
The tape ends.