Don't Be Suspicious

exACTLY. what the fuck is this half fucking truckbed supposed to do. you cant put the dogs back there. you cant fit a bucket of crabs and sixteen crab pots back there. it's the worst. where are the cables you never use supposed to go? the shovel you dont remember buying? the ropes that have absolutely no purpose except to make it look slightly like you may have committed a murder?

I'm not even a "Merican and I really feel this.

neither am i but my. aunt and her husband are crabbers. my family comes from alaska and so i get that sea-hick shit

I just saw my band teacher absolutely book it six miles

I just saw my band teacher absolutely book it six miles

Why does that surprise you?

_{my director runs marathons lmao so she’s pretty damn fast}

I just saw my band teacher absolutely book it six miles

Why does that surprise you?

_{my director runs marathons lmao so she’s pretty damn fast}

so does mine lmao there's just
no preparing yourself for seeing your band teacher
in a matching tracksuit and hat
b o o k i n g
i t
through your town lmao

I just saw my band teacher absolutely book it six miles

Why does that surprise you?

_{my director runs marathons lmao so she’s pretty damn fast}

so does mine lmao there's just
no preparing yourself for seeing your band teacher
in a matching tracksuit and hat
b o o k i n g
i t
through your town lmao

oh lol I don’t live in the same area as my school so I don’t see people I know… like… ever.

one time I went to a restaurant with my friends and long story short I accidentally ate a piece of crab meat which sent me into anaphylactic shock. The EMT that came to save my silly life was really (and I mean really) attractive which made me all embarrassed and grumpy that I was literally dying from eating something I shouldn't have and he looked me right in the eye and said "Don't be crabby."

I want to marry this man.

He proposes with "don't be crabby, I'll spend my life with you".

Jay has left the chat

plot twist: The EMT was Jay

–jk Jay was actually a life guard tho. 😎😍

one time I went to a restaurant with my friends and long story short I accidentally ate a piece of crab meat which sent me into anaphylactic shock. The EMT that came to save my silly life was really (and I mean really) attractive which made me all embarrassed and grumpy that I was literally dying from eating something I shouldn't have and he looked me right in the eye and said "Don't be crabby."

I want to marry this man.

He proposes with "don't be crabby, I'll spend my life with you".

Jay has left the chat

plot twist: The EMT was Jay

–jk Jay was actually a life guard tho. 😎😍

you ended up with the hot lifeguard?
eris is out here livin that y/n life

low key Jay is literally a YA love interest.
Check it:

Birthday within 6 months of mine (almost to the day)
Tall
Blonde
Blue eyed
Athletic figure (Ex-polo player and swimmer)
STRONG
Spent his summers as a life guard/ teaching kids to swim
Loves children
Ridiculously smart
College graduate (Hello Ivy League?)
Studying for Law School
Loves to cook (and it hella good at it)
Loves books and rocking out to music
Is a total nerd when it comes to comic books/fantasy novels/viking sagas
Adventurous
D O O D L E S
LOVES ANIMALS
Like the sweetest guy ever (He's a living breathing Labrador)
Excellent kisser
Totally dorkishly romantic
Writes poetry
Comes from a wealthy ass family
Knows how to blacksmith
My parents love him.

I mean I could go on and on but if I read about a character like Jay I would literally put the book down and burn it.

Jay is a gary stu

And he's dating

Me

ya feel?

Excellent kisser

don't cross that out it's an important detail
adds to his gary stu-ness
you have to be able to say "HiS LiPs CrAsHeD oNtO MiNe AnD oUr ToNgUeS fOuGhT fOr DoMiNaNcE"

The implication isn't PG

Then PG-13 it is.

Dangggggggg Jay. breathes in in amazement

Dom has been giving me slight homosexual vibes these days.
Even though we all know he is the Straightest of the Straights.

dom

Dom could be half demi+gay because some guys are hellamazingly beautiful in every way

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And that’s on internalized homophobia

I mean, I am lgbtq, and I have bit of internalized homophobia myself.

And that’s on internalized homophobia

Nah. Logic based belief about morality.

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