He raised an eyebrow, tugging his shirt all the way down. "Jade, I…don't understand what you're saying." he said slowly.
The Hero shows up at the Villain's doorstep one night // One on One // CLOSED
She looked away, embarrassed. "I… I think you know I care about you. More than I know I should." She admitted. "But I also know that we can't be… anything. Even if we both wanted to… I just need to know if I should give up all hope in this… fantasy that's been buzzing in my head almost non-stop when I'm around you. Or if I'm not as crazy as I think I'm starting to sound."
He inhaled, letting out his breath slowly. "Jade, I…" He shook his head a little bit. "Even…" He groaned softly, covering his face with a hand.
Jade sighed and nodded slowly. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have put this one you." she shook her head. "I just… I couldn't sit downstairs alone and just keep these thoughts in my head without eventually exploding. I'm sorry." she said, very embarrassed as she started to walk away.
He shook his head. "No, Jade, I…" He trailed off. "I feel the same way, I just…it's really not a good idea for us."
She froze in her steps when she heard him say that and she swear her heart jumped. "I… I know it's not but…" she chuckled a little. "It's kind of funny. I never understood wanting something you can't have. I've always thought things through but now… I don't want to think about the reasons why not." she blushed a little.
He laughed a little bit. "Yeah. I…" He shrugged slightly. "I don't know."
She smiled softly at him. "I don't really know either." she admitted. "But I know that I like you and… In another time… another world… I'm sure we could have been very happy." she smiled, her eyes starting to tear up. "But… here and now; I don't have a clue."
He watched her. Swallowed. "I…I know." he said softly. He sat down on the bed, running his hands through his hair. "I'm sorry."
“It’s ok.” she said, wiping her eyes. ”I’m sorry, I’m being ridiculous. Maybe I am going crazy.” she chuckled humorlessly. ”Falling like this… I’ve never let anyone get this close.”
He shook his head a little bit. "You aren't being ridiculous." he replied softly. "I really…I'm sorry."
”Thank you, but it's ok. This is my fault.” she sighed, leaning against the doorframe.
He shook his head. "No, it's not." he said softly. He sighed.
”Well, it's not your fault.” she pointed out. ”So mathematically it has to be mine.”
He shrugged. "If I weren't who and what I am, than it wouldn't really matter."
Jade didn't look at him when he said that. It may have been partly true but she wasn't going to blame him. ”No.” she shook her head. ”It’s what we do that makes this difficult. I like who you are, the way you are.”
"That's exactly what I just said, Jade, just phrased a little differently." he said softly, shaking his head a little bit.
”No, it's not. You said who you are was the problem when it's our clashing career choices.” she clarified. ”Who you are is a very sweet, kind man who’s had a rough past and… maybe doesn't know how to change…” she started out confidently but faltered a little towards the end.
He snorted softly, shaking his head again. "It doesn't matter." he replied, not looking at her.
”Because neither of us will quit or can quit.” she reluctantly agreed, staring at the floor.
"Yeah." he agreed softly. He swallowed, looking down at his hands.
”What about running away and starting over?” she asked softly. ”We could go somewhere where they've never heard of us…” she sighed, honestly doubtful that she could do it.
He let out a faint laugh. "No. That…I don't think either of us could do that." he replied.
”Yeah…” she nodded. ”I did make a promise that I would…” she sighed.
He sighed softly. "Yeah.
“I… I should probably head back downstairs.” she said, feeling a little awkward for starting this. She didn't often listen to her heart as much as her head usually.
Killian shrugged. "If…if you want to." He replied softly.
What she really wanted was to climb into the bed with him and fall asleep in his arms again… but she couldn't do that. Things were bad enough between them. If she listened to her feelings again she wasn't sure what would happen. ”I should.” she said but didn't leave yet.
He bit his lip. "You should…but you don't have to." he patted the bed a little as if in invitation.
She blushed at the offer and, against her better judgment, walked into the room and sat on the bed next to him. Not very close but enough that he could easily wrap his arm around her.