Josh stood outside the classroom with a few minutes left to go until lunch, sweaty hands shoved into his pockets. Five days since his fight with Gray…. five days with only fleeting glimpses of Laura.
Five days of guilt for walking away on her like that.
Which was why he was waiting for her now, running a carefully planned apology over in his head. But the moment his eyes clashed with hers—–blue lenses today, what did that mean?—–every single thought he possessed crumbled to dust.
"Laura?"
Laura blinked in surprise when a familiar voice reached her ears. That soft voice that she’d grown to like. She looked to her side and met the eyes of—
“Josh,” she breathed, his name slipping off of her tongue smoothly. “What’s up? It’s been a while.”
Hot shame flooded Josh’s cheeks.
“I—Yeah.” He began to rock back and forth on the balls of his feet, clearly anxious about the situation. “Can I—Can we talk? Briefly?”
Laura mistook his nervousness as a feeling of wanting to get away quickly. She didn’t blame him. She was, after all, his crush’s boyfriend’s best friend. There was no reason for him to be there.
So she pulled on a smile.
“It’s fine,” she shrugged. “I understand why you walked away. I would, too, if I saw my crush with his girlfriend. Or her boyfriend, if I were a boy.”
Josh winced at how she was referring to Violeta as his crush, and at the fact that she was openly admitting to having one herself.
“But it isn’t fine,” he argued softly, leaning sideways against the wall. “It’s a stupid and inconsiderate thing to do. And I did it. Which is why I want to apologize. And…”
“You don’t really owe me anything. You had no reason to stay,” Laura kept the forced smile on her features. He hadn’t denied the crush statement. He still liked Violeta. “I accept your apology, so it’s fine.”
“Laura….” A sigh blew past his lips. “You don’t have to pretend. I know what your real smiles look like. I know I made a mistake, but… I miss talking to you. I liked what we had, even if it only lasted a few days. Can we have a do-over? Can…. I be your friend?”
Laura’s heart clenched and a shiver ran down her spine when her name slipped from his tongue. The smile dropped from her face. He knew it was fake. She didn’t have to keep it up.
But he said he knew what her real smiles looked like. He had paid attention to her. Warmth flooded her. She smiled again, though this time, it was genuine.
“Yeah,” Laura agreed softly, though she didn’t want to be just a friend. “We can have a do-over. I missed you, too.”
When Laura smiled again——a true smile this time——Josh was painfully aware of how his body reacted. Heart stumbling over several consecutive beats, hands tightening in his pockets, pink rising to his cheeks. This, she did to him with nothing but a simple smile.
“Good…” he murmured. “I’m glad.”
Laura felt surprised at the pink that rose up on his cheeks. He was just so adorable. Such a shy man, totally unlike the others she had gotten together with, even if it was briefly. Josh was… she liked him the best. There was no comparison.
“I’m glad, too,” she grinned. “Now, I would say I want to skip class and hang out with you, but I absolutely suck at Calc and I can’t miss it. My C would drop to a D. I cannot have that, so I’ll see you later?”
“I could help you study—“ Josh blurted out before he had the chance to stop himself. “After, I mean. For Calculus. If you want. Which you probably don’t——forget I said anything.”
“No!” Laura immediately blurted out before she collected herself. “I mean, no. I would absolutely love it, but I’m a huge pain when it comes to Calculus. I’m also a terrible student.”
“I’ve tutored people before—and this would be a much more causal thing.” A bead of sweat dropped down the back of Josh’s neck. “I’d love to—help.”
Laura shifted nervously, her eyes darting elsewhere. “How… good are you at Physics, Josh…?”
Josh was tugging anxiously at his sleeve by now, completely certain he was messing everything up. “I’m fairly good. How come?”
Laura rubbed the back of her neck. “I might… need help with that, too…”
Josh found himself relaxing when she didn’t react negatively, and hastened to replace the smile on his face. “I’d be happy to help out a little.”
“Perfect,” Laura grinned just as the warning bell rang. She winced. “Ah, two minutes to head to class. You should get going, too, Josh!”
Josh raised a hand, offering Laura a little wave. That smile… It got him every time. "See you around, Laura."
TIME SKIP - one week later
Click-click. Click-click. Click-click.
Josh's thumb worked relentlessly away at the button on the bottom of his pen, trying to draw the familiar sound over his mind like a blanket while he waited for Laura to arrive. He was supposed to help her study today, nearly a week after he apologized and offered his aid in the first place. But, as usual, he was ridiculously early, and couldn't stand the silence in the library.
Click. Click. Click.
The background noise soothed him, brought the jittery bouncing of his knee down, but the moment he caught sight of a familiar face in the window of the library, the temporary calm dissipated like mist in the summer sun.
The pen slid from his fingers.
Laura didn’t know how many times she looked at herself in the mirror. She had braided her hair, just a simple hairstyle, and wore a blue t-shirt with short sleeves. It had mermaids drawn on it with the words, “MERMAID SQUAD” written on it. She topped it off with shorts and a pair of converse. She’d chosen light red lenses to go with it, a color usually associated with anger and danger, but also for lighter emotions such as shyness. She certainly did feel shy. But who wouldn’t, if they were being tutored by their crush?
Shaking her head, Laura grabbed her bag and bolted out the door, hoping she wasn’t too late. The makeup had taken some time. Yes, she wanted to look pretty. So what?
Finally, when she reached the library, she wiped her hands on her shorts before stepping in, eyes trying to find Josh. When she did, her heart kickstarted. She mustered a smile on her face and walked over to him.
“I’m not late, am I?” She said with a sheepish laugh, rubbing the back of her head, trying to ignore just how attractive he looked.
Josh couldn't take his eyes off her.
Dimly, he heard the clattering sound of his pen hitting the floor, but he was much too preoccupied with the radiant girl in front of him to pay it much attention. She wasn't even wearing anything particularly fancy of revealing, but something about the shyness on the curve of her lips and the fact that she had taken to time to wear makeup for hi—–No. Nope. We're not going down that path today. Laura would never dress of up for someone like him, so he needed to get his head out of the clouds and converse with her like a regular person.
"Laura." His mouth was dry, fumbling to find the right words to say. "Hi. Hey. Yeah. I mean—no, you're not late. I just like being obnoxiously early for everything."
Did I mention how beautiful you look today?
A blush coated Laura’s cheeks at his staring. She told herself he didn’t mean anything by it. There was no way he was looking over at her like that. He was probably just wondering why she was dressed like this for a tutoring session. That was all. Nothing else.
“Ah, that’s good,” Laura laughed as she took a seat, positioning her feet in his direction. “I was worried I might have taken too much time.”
Her eyes looked over him again. He looked so goddamn—“Hot.” For a second, Laura didn’t comprehend what she said. Once she did, her heart failed. “I-I mean—it’s so hot today! Is there no air conditioning in this library?”
Smooth. Real smooth, Laura.
Poor Josh didn't stand a single chance.
"I–I have no idea," he stammered, shifting one hand in a futile attempt to cover his pink cheeks. Sitting next to Laura in her outfit was like sitting next to Beyonce in ratty old pyjamas, and Josh felt his self-esteem dip lower and lower. Sure, his clothes didn't look bad, but his jeans were too plain and so was his white, short-sleeved t-shirt.
"How are you?"
Laura exhaled deeply through her nose, trying to calm herself down. She was acting like a teenager with a crush. That was unacceptable. She needed to act like a normal friend.
“I’m tired,” she admitted. “I just wanted to fall asleep, but then I thought of you and I willed myself to get up. What about you?”
I'm tired.
Sympathy flickered across Josh's features. Then….
I thought of you but I willed myself to get up.
Her words, though he knew they meant nothing, whipped his heart into a wild frenzy of frantic beats. His freckles were blurred once more by a deep blush, and his eyes skittered anxiously to one side. "Well, I'll try my best not to bore you to sleep, then."
Laura have him an innocent, childish smile, adoring the pink on his cheeks. He was so adorable. “If I fall asleep, will you act as my pillow?”
Josh froze in place. Back to the flirting…. not that he was complaining. But he had to keep his composure around her somehow, and with these little comments? It was impossible.
Still rubbing at his pink cheeks, he somehow managed to choke out a reply. "If–If you fall asleep, I'll just bring in extra calculus work for you to do."
Laura pouted, lifting her arms in the air and stretching. “You wouldn’t. That would be so cruel, Josh.”
Josh melted ever so slightly at the sight of Laura's pout. She stretched, and her shirt lifted above her waistline—
He tore his eyes away. Not the time, Josh. It's never going to be the time. "You know I can't be cruel to you, I'm just teasing."
