RP? One on One

"Jair is back." She replied, being very up front about the situation. I have nothing to hide when it comes to Jair. Kana had told Aydan everything about what really happened between Jair and her. It was not a secret that they had feelings for each other.
"And I've made him my guard again." She remembered how selfish and toxic she was just a few minutes ago, by making sure Jair couldn't leave this situation. She took in a deep breath, waiting to see how Aydan would react.

Aydan raised his eyebrows, thinking for a long moment. "…okay." he finally replied. "What I had originally said still stands. I don't mind if you decide to have an affair with him. Just…no bastard kids. That's all I ask. We don't need kids that may or may not have a claim on the throne." He said, looking at her. Then he frowned slightly. "I thought he was dead?"

She sighed and looked down at the ground. "I did too… But he just showed up out of the blue." She thought for a moment. "He seems different. And not in a good way."

Aydan frowned slightly. "He didn't…hurt you, did he?" He asked quickly, eyes flickering over Kana to check for wounds.

She shook her head. "He would never do that." Kana sighed. "He just seems detached. It's like he's a different person." She paused before looking up at Aydan, giving him a small smile. "Sorry, you probably don't want to hear about it."

Aydan shook his head. "It's fine." He sighed softly. "Kana, he did just go through a civil war. That leaves an effect on anyone. Give him time." He shrugged slightly.

"You're right. Thank you, Aydan." Kana bit her lip. I don't want to move. But I should. Usually I'd have left by now.

Aydan nodded. "You're welcome." He peeked down at his book. "Is that all? Can i go back to my book?" He asked.

"Yes," She got up, hiding the fact that she was shaking. "Have fun." She said, and exited the garden. I should check on Jair.

Aydan nodded, giving her a small smile as he went back to his book.
Jair had peeled his shirt off, and was sitting on his bed working on changing the bandages that nearly covered his torso.

Kana had managed to work her way towards Jair's room. She peeked in, leaning her torso against the wall outside of his room for balance. She tried not to make a noise as she watched Jair change his bandages.

(So, Kana has stalker tendencies)

Jair hissed between his teeth as one bandage pulled at one of the still healing wounds, blood oozing out. He set the ruined bandages aside, taking deep breaths. There were whip wounds on his back, and burns along his sides. Numerous slashes, cuts, and other wounds scattered everywhere, including over his front.

Kana put a hand over her mouth to silence her gasp. Oh my god. Jair, what happened to you? She felt the need to help him, but she stayed put. It would be rude to just barge in like this anyway.

He cleaned off the wounds, making sure none of them were infected, then started bandaging them back up. I should have let them heal longer before coming…

Kana stopped looking. It's an invasion of privacy, anyway. She did, however, wait outside of his room. It's not like she had anything else to do. Desperately wanting to rest again, she sat on the ground while waiting for him to finish bandaging his wounds.

Jair finished the bandages, and pulled his shirt back on, standing with a soft sigh. He was really starting to wish he had some pain medication.

It's rather comfy down here. Kana smiled internally. I wouldn't mind staying down here for a bit longer. She stood up anyway, and gently knocked on Jair's doorframe, pretending to not have seen what she just witnessed.

Jair looked up. "Oh. Hey, Kana." He greeted with a tiny smile. He adjusted his shirt. I don't want her to see how messed up I am…

Pretending like you didn't just re bandage all of your wounds, huh? Gods, I knew something was wrong. Should I have pressed him for more information? "Hey… You feel any better?" She asked, hesitation showing through her voice. Probably not. But, I don't want it to just let it get worse for him.

He shrugged. "I'm fine." He avoided her eyes. "What do you need?" He asked, looking at her. Is she okay? She doesn't look okay. He bit his lip slightly.

I need you to get better, physically and emotionally. She shook her head. "I just wanted to see if you were alright." Kana's vision started to get blurry and distorted. Oh fu- She pinched her thigh, hoping that would snap her out of it. Crap.

He frowned slightly. "Kana? You don't look okay…" He said slowly. You're one to talk. He thought. You haven't said a word about what happened. She thinks you're okay when you know perfectly well that you aren't!

She closed her eyes and nodded. "I know, Jair." She seemed slightly annoyed. Makes sense. People get agitated when they're hungry.

He backed up a step. "Okay." He said softly. He swallowed. "You shouldn't rehire me." He blurted, looking down at his feet. "You should find a different guard."

Kana looked up at Jair but her eyes didn't focus on him. "Excuse me?" A twinge of anger, an emotion she had practically buried, jolted her. "Are you being serious?"

He nodded. "I can't fight anymore." He said softly. "I freeze up. I panic. I can spar, I can train, but I can't…fight. I-I'm useless." He looked down at his hands, which were shaking slightly.

Kana slowly made her way over to him. "Are you sure? You're not just saying that because…" she trailed off. It would be unwise to mention Aydan. And I don't want to say anything that hints that I'm somewhat aware of his situation. Who knows how he would react to that. "Jair, do you really mean that?" She looked up at him, putting on a poker face. She didn't want to let her emotions effect his answer.

He nodded again. "The only thing I was ever good at, and now I can't do it." He muttered to himself. To her, he said, "Yeah… I-I'm sorry. I just…" There were children. My god I killed children. He swallowed, hands clenching and unclenching by his sides.

Kana looked down at his hands the back up at him. "Well… If I let you go, would you still visit?" She asked with a suddenly quiet voice, a lump forming in her throat.

Jair shrugged. "Would you even want me to?" He asked softly. "I'm not…the same person I used to be." Children, god forgive me. I killed children. Child soldiers. My god.