Tell Me Stuff You Heard High/Middle School Students Say!

"How many licks does it take to get to the center of a human spine?"
"I was with you until that last part."

"… Am I a monster fucker if I really want to go on a date with Indrid from TAZ?"

“What is happiness?”
“What’s friendship?”
“What is love?”
“Baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more!”

random junior: NO! SHOW ME A PICTURE OF YOUR KNEE CAPS DOING A KEYBOARD SMASH

*Talking about god
friend NO HE DOES HAVE A MOM, IT WAS VIRGIN MARY
me: you mean Jesus,
friend: no i dont i mean…..
friend after a minute: FUCKKKKKKK

“She died as she lived..”
“Are you talking about me?”
“No?? Are you ok??”

Some quality quotes of mine from today:

“This water is water”

“Poor, lonely underwear”

Me to myself on a daily

Some girl I was fighting with: "You know what, I am a bitch. Bitch is another word for dog, dogs bark, bark is on trees, trees are part of nature, and danture's beautiful, so I"m beautiful."

Me: "Nature's also being destroyed at a rapid pace so uh have fun dying motherfucker"

(mmm whacha sayyyyy)

"Who needs icecream when we have cocktails, babeeeeeeey~"

student: sir, give me your phone.
teacher: okay..?

-5 minutes after the phone is returned-

teacher: seriously! we get it! you're gay!

shows pride flag drawn on notes app

student: just wanted to make sure you really did know!

No lol I'm an England child
It is indeed Ruby

“I’ve become the sin that Jesus died for.”

"Massage the bag."
We made slushies in science class with ice, punch, and ice cream salt XP

"Massage the bag."
We made slushies in science class with ice, punch, and ice cream salt XP

I thought I read 'Massage the fag.'
Ahhhhhh I'm dead inside…

“It’s not my fault you like to touch guys. You shouldn’t touch me, I’m not gay.”
“Yesterday I sucked your dick and you didn’t say no Homo.”

(for some reason that makes me think of eric x adam from sex education)

"Hopefully I don't get his heart cancer…… wait no not heart cancer. heart problems"

Oddly enough, heart cancer isn't very common due to the fact that your heart cells don't actually replicate that often. They just grow in size and replicate maybe a few times before the die and are replaced.

“If you could fuck any Mario Character, who would it be?”
One friend: Donkey Kong
Me: Daisy because she’s thicc
Other friend: Wario

“If you could fuck any Mario Character, who would it be?”
One friend: Donkey Kong
Me: Daisy because she’s thicc
Other friend: Wario

Not even Bowser?! smh

“If you could fuck any Mario Character, who would it be?”
One friend: Donkey Kong
Me: Daisy because she’s thicc
Other friend: Wario

Not even Bowser?! smh

He’s my personal second choice