"Nothing. I don't know." He replied.
Cinderella AU // OxO // Closed
Lloyd sighed softly, adjusting his grip on Ellis's hand. "They all tell me I'm too soft…"
"You aren't. You just…need to get your priorities straight."
"But I feel like my priority should be the people and not myself…"
"No. You need to put yourself first sometimes."
Lloyd sighed. "But it just… it feels so selfish…"
"It's not selfish to take care of yourself, Lloyd!"
Lloyd fidgeted a bit. "I know, but it… it feels selfish…"
"But it's not."
Lloyd sighed weakly and looked away again. "I… I feel like I'm always supposed to do what's best for the people. It's basically my job."
He shook his head. "Just because it's your job doesn't mean you always have to be doing it. It's okay to be selfish sometimes."
"But I do have to do it all the time! When I'm king, I-I can't just… stop being king for a bit!"
"Lloyd…" he closed his eyes. "I don't know, then, okay?"
"I-I just want to be able to help everybody, but I can't!" Lloyd seemed to be growing increasingly distressed and was clinging tighter to Ellis's hand.
Ellis bit his lip. "That's the thing, Lloyd. You can't. I can't. No one can help everyone."
"And I hate it. It… it just m-makes me feel like such a failure…"
"You are not a failure, Lloyd!"
Lloyd winced at Ellis's tone and cowered a bit, looking up at him meekly.
Ellis looked down at him.
"But… what if I still feel like one?"
(gtg sorry)
"But you aren't."
(Np)
Lloyd sighed, looking away again. "I just want to make people happy…"
"I know. But no one's going to be happy if you die."
"I want to protect them…" He whispered weakly. "I just… I don't know."
"I know."
Lloyd was quiet for a few seconds. "I'm willing to sacrifice myself for them, but I'm not supposed to die…"
"Mhm. Exactly."
"Hmm." Lloyd looked up at the ceiling. "I should not be so at peace with the idea of dying."
He shook his head. "No, you shouldn't."
Lloyd was quiet for another couple of seconds. "Why am I okay with dying?"