Out of Context

"This is the worst thing I've experienced."
"Worse than being pepper-sprayed?"
"No. That was pain. This is suffering."
"Alright fair enough."

I love this-

"Wait, why is [friend] writing hentai in the script?!"

I made an unholy noise

We're writing a skit about the Bermuda triangle, and my very wholesome Catholic friend starts writing this long paragraph about tentacles grabbing a character and like surrounding them and stuff and me and my friends in public school just shared a Look as one read it out loud.

Catholic schools are like a whole other dimension. Even just being inside of one is a little off-putting and I'm not sure why

"Wait, why is [friend] writing hentai in the script?!"

I made an unholy noise

We're writing a skit about the Bermuda triangle, and my very wholesome Catholic friend starts writing this long paragraph about tentacles grabbing a character and like surrounding them and stuff and me and my friends in public school just shared a Look as one read it out loud.

Catholic schools are like a whole other dimension. Even just being inside of one is a little off-putting and I'm not sure why

As someone who spent 6 years at one….agreed.

"If your fingernails are pink, you're alive"
"Shit what color are mine? Wait…"

"How tf do lesbians work"

As in..

"Is that Elon Musk's baby name?"

"Jesus Christ Supercar, if you will-"

"Jesus Christ Supercar, if you will-"

I don't know why this is hilarious, but it is.

"Car Hitler was obviously a Ford."

"Jesus Christ Supercar, if you will-"

I don't know why this is hilarious, but it is.

"Car Hitler was obviously a Ford."

I agree, because Henry Ford was an antisemitic nazi

My friend shared the Cars copypasta with us and I came to that realization

"I know about migration y'all I have more than a single brain cell even if it doesn't seem like it often-"

:[

:[

:]

wheeze

"I dunno, I've never been white before!"

(Paraphrasing)
"The party aboard the one ship that made it to shore was comprised of 49 women and 3 men, two of whom died and one of whom spontaneously anamorphed into a salmon."

I'm getting mythology vibes

"The lakes don't freeze in Florida. BECAUSE FLORIDA IS A MYTH"

"Something tells me that I shouldn't have trust you when I said you could use my eggs…"

"It's a trophy for theater. You know what they're called?" Leans across table "Oscars!"

"We shouldn't accuse innocent people."
"We also shouldn't start rumors but here we are."

"He gets lost sometimes."
Picks up cat "TAKE IT BACK OR I SET THE CAT ON THE GAMEBOARD!"

"I couldn't find a way to smoothly integrate this information into the story, but I just wanted to let y'all know that Ace was wearing a grass skirt, coconut bra, and a lei as his costume."