Tell Me Stuff You Heard High/Middle School Students Say!

“You are a single children.”

i am almost out of data I’ll be back with highlights tomorrow

“Our science and math teachers said they’re going to an elite school to observe. Isn’t it strange that they’re gone during the Area 51 raid?”
“How could they!”

HIGHLIGHTS

“I missed the root beer.”
“What?”
“I missed the root beer.”
“what?”
“This is Sprite. I missed the root beer.”

“You have lost your eating privileges.”

“The motorcycle cut my head off.”

“I clapped the first two times because I was happy but I didn’t really want to show it.”
“I’m just not happy.”

“I’m not like other girls.”
Everyone left in the pizza place: “I have snake arms!”

"I want to see how people react when I die."

"No dying on the carpet!" along with "No blood on the carpet!"

"MOBY MAX CAN SUCK MY DICK"

Slaps backpack.
"Oi, my phone's in there."
Slaps it harder.

"Fuck you."
_
"Get fucked!"
__
"What the fuck Kyle!"

“Cars is the worst franchise. The third one was depressing, the second shouldn’t have happened, and the first was semi decent.”
death glare from kid who loves the movies

“You’re going to have a second tongue by the time I’m done with you.”

“You’re going to have a second tongue by the time I’m done with you.”

I'm wondering not only the context but also how that would be possible XD

Either they split the tongue or forcibly French-kiss them.

"I am going to kill you and your father, make it seem like an accident, than watch your mother blame herself for it."
"Jesus Christ, I just took a pretzel!"

((I don’t even know the context, first block is just weird like that))

"Who's on the penny?"
"George Washington!"
"Y'all need to go to back to kindergarten."

"I don't think you realize how glorious this is. The pieces of my life now come together. I understand the meaning of life. Don't you see? This is magical. This is precious. This is beautiful."
"Dude, it's legit just two fruit snack packages stuck together."
"IT'S STILL BEAUTIFUL"

"I am going to kill you and your father, make it seem like an accident, than watch your mother blame herself for it."
"Jesus Christ, I just took a pretzel!"

Me when someone takes my food

Moral of the story, don't touch Reed's food unless you have a death wish.

"this sucks dick but not in a good way"

"It just occurred to me that I'm allergic to grass."
"… We're sitting in a goddamn field."

“It was tacky tourist day, not sexy tourist day, but I guess you can’t help it.”

"Look at him over there eating ramen noodles! He looks like a slave."

"you're an eshay, you're an eshay, EVERYONES AN ESHAY! except you, you're a vsco, which is just as bad" - some yr 11 kid that walked into my english class…

"Bad day?"
"If someone so much as looks at me wrong I'm snapping their neck."
"Oh shit."