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Tell Me Stuff You Heard High/Middle School Students Say!

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person_off
Deleted user

My friends are calling me "Zelda" to spite me. I came to school dressed as Link.

nOooooO-

Update: In between classes three people called me Zelda. Unironically.

what

person_off
Deleted user

"Vibe check time, who will survive!"

group

"How many Blackhawk Bucks do you have?"
"Sixty-four."
"WHAT?! I only have seven dollars. Seven. You can't buy anything with that in this economy!"

group

So there are a pair of twins in my grade, here are some highlights of one trying to tell a three-sentence story:
"And a gear fell out-"
"It was a propeller!"

"He didn't even use it."
"No, he did! Once, when he test drived it!"
"Drived?"

"Do you love me, [redacted]?"
"No. I hope you die."

person_off
Deleted user

"I'm a goth cowboy, yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehaw!"

group

"Hey, let's not make this Power Rangers 3"

  • two kids facing each other with rulers
@ZephirFox8812

"Do it for the vine!"
"What if I did it for the vine?"
unholy screaming

(there is context to this, I will give if asked)

person_off
Deleted user

"Would Kirby taste like everything he ate?"
"Reed-"
"Would he?"
"Reed-"
"It's not fucking cannibalism he is a giant pink ball who consumes things, I am a fleshy prison who also consumes things!"

group
@SpookyScarySnoteleks group

"Would Kirby taste like everything he ate?"
"Reed-"
"Would he?"
"Reed-"
"It's not fucking cannibalism he is a giant pink ball who consumes things, I am a fleshy prison who also consumes things!"

I mean, he has a tongue, so I'd have to assume so

person_off
Deleted user

"Would Kirby taste like everything he ate?"
"Reed-"
"Would he?"
"Reed-"
"It's not fucking cannibalism he is a giant pink ball who consumes things, I am a fleshy prison who also consumes things!"

I mean, he has a tongue, so I'd have to assume so

I meant like,,, eating him.
Just munching and crunching that gumball looking motherfucker

group
@SpookyScarySnoteleks group

"Would Kirby taste like everything he ate?"
"Reed-"
"Would he?"
"Reed-"
"It's not fucking cannibalism he is a giant pink ball who consumes things, I am a fleshy prison who also consumes things!"

I mean, he has a tongue, so I'd have to assume so

I meant like,,, eating him.
Just munching and crunching that gumball looking motherfucker

Oh god

Probably not
Game Theory made a video where they proved he's an amoeba, which would have no reason to take the taste of somebody, unless it was gross and/or would poison a predator, in which case it'd make a useful defense mechanism.

person_off
Deleted user

"Would Kirby taste like everything he ate?"
"Reed-"
"Would he?"
"Reed-"
"It's not fucking cannibalism he is a giant pink ball who consumes things, I am a fleshy prison who also consumes things!"

I mean, he has a tongue, so I'd have to assume so

I meant like,,, eating him.
Just munching and crunching that gumball looking motherfucker

Oh god

Probably not
Game Theory made a video where they proved he's an amoeba, which would have no reason to take the taste of somebody, unless it was gross and/or would poison a predator, in which case it'd make a useful defense mechanism.

darn, what do you think he'd taste like?
crushed hopes and dreams

group
@SpookyScarySnoteleks group

"Would Kirby taste like everything he ate?"
"Reed-"
"Would he?"
"Reed-"
"It's not fucking cannibalism he is a giant pink ball who consumes things, I am a fleshy prison who also consumes things!"

I mean, he has a tongue, so I'd have to assume so

I meant like,,, eating him.
Just munching and crunching that gumball looking motherfucker

Oh god

Probably not
Game Theory made a video where they proved he's an amoeba, which would have no reason to take the taste of somebody, unless it was gross and/or would poison a predator, in which case it'd make a useful defense mechanism.

darn, what do you think he'd taste like?
crushed hopes and dreams

Poison, probably
There are some poisons that turn your body pink, do with that what you will

person_off
Deleted user

"Moist Moist!! Elbow Fluid for sale!!! Only Six hundred and Sixty Six dollars!!"

group
@nebula__ group

"do you ever wonder if kaede's death is the only reason shuichi took his hat off? idk, maybe his head got sweaty and he didn't wanna live like that for the rest of the game"
"hmm… good point, maybe that's part of why he took it off"
"or maybe kokichi wanted to eat shuichi's hat and stole it while he was sleeping, and shuichi was so confused that he just went along with it"

  • two girls discussing the events of danganronpa v3 at lunch at the table behind me and my girlfriend
group
@Kanaroli group

"It's the being bald but still having a receding hairline for me, Mr. Kane."
Some girl finally snapped at our shitty history teacher and spoke only facts

person_off
Deleted user

"Listen, asshole, I am five feet six inches of pure rage and a lot of lower body strength, I will kick your balls in."
-Me, so close to snapping.

@Musical_Queen

"Hey! I will invert your ribcage" (Random kid)
"Sorry, It's not mine" (Me)

person_off
Deleted user

"Man, your skin is flawless!"
"Oh it's not my skin, but thank you!!"

group
@Kanaroli group

"You can't slide into our DM's dm's dude, it''l be awkward for the rest of the campaign"

person_off
Deleted user

(dskaldifuehjsd I need context for that becuase I know thats dnd shit right there)

person_off
Deleted user

"It's not cannibalism-"
"What the-"
"NO, NO SHUT UP! I'VE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS! IT'S NOT CANIBALISM IF MY AIR GENASI THREATENS TO EAT A TEIFLINGS!"

person_off
Deleted user

"Smooth brain."
"Wrinkely kidney"
"What the fuck"

group
@nebula__ group

"hnn… it's the knife and the uniform for me"

  • my girlfriend, while I'm showing her a picture of hanako-kun

"it's the hakujoudai and the fact that he's floating for me"

  • me in response, pointing out the stuff she didn't notice about the aforementioned picture
group
@Kanaroli group

(dskaldifuehjsd I need context for that becuase I know thats dnd shit right there)

(These 2 guys in front of me in math class always talk about dnd and one of them was gushing over their dm, he wanted to slide into her dm's to flirt but his friend obviously protested)

group
@Pickles group

"Wait what's that? Is it a sex thing?"
"No."
"Welllll-"

@Musical_Queen

Teacher starts playing music

"That's the Mario Kart theme music" - like five kids in my math class

group
@Pickles group

"Woww, we have two people of color now, plus a queer woman, and a bunch of straight white conservative boys, we're so diverse!"

person_off
Deleted user

"Boys, your homosexual is showing."

language
@lxvender_darling language

"HahHHahHAHahah BiShEs Im A fOoKinG UNiCoRnNnnN-"
~Me and my friends.